Archive for January, 2011

Would-be President Clampett

January 12, 2011

At some point during the election season when revelations about Sarah Palin crony/Senate candidate Joe Miller’s participation in some bungled redneck political intrigue, wherein he tried to influence the election, and or, business of the state Republican party by illegally using a colleague’s computer started to surface, a diarist on Daily Kos brilliantly compared the whole sorry Palin/Miller gang to the Clampett family; an imbecilic lot from the hills with outsize delusions of grandeur, dreaming up petty minor league (compared to the Atwaters and Roves of the world) scams and political dirty tricks, yet too dumb, hamfisted and devoid of ability to even bring those off without leaving buckets full of clues and evidence at the scene of the crime.  So now after spending an entire year: putting crosshairs and bullseyes on real-live politicians in tough-gal Internet graphics (her name proudly and prominently affixed at the top), playacting with guns and shooting real-live animals on TV and CONSTANTLY getting in front of cameras and loudly telling people to “RELOAD” time and again, she, as Representative Clyburn so eloquently said, seems “intellectually incapable” of understanding the legitimate causal connection her dangerously idiotic and overblown, yet purposefully chosen, rhetoric may have on the most unstable members of our society.  You know, people like Jared Loughner, the man who shot Congresswoman Giffords, one of the 20 politicians with the big ‘ole SarahPAC target stamped on her, and murdered 6 other innocent people.  It just seems to be another in the neverending line of damaging coincidences, misunderstandings, lies, bad decisions, inflammatory remarks, the infinite supply of pettiness and sorry, simpering, somehow inexhaustible sense of “victimhood” that surrounds Sarah Palin like a fog.

After being silent for days when her typically inept attempts to spin away the unfortunate fact that someone actually did go and shoot one of the people she’d placed a target on failed, the thinking among many pundits and citizens alike was that nothing could be worse than her silence—that is until this morning when her “response” video surfaced.  Even as someone with the bar set so low, with expectations of their behavior, class and comportment fixed at a subterranean level that kindergarten students would scoff at, she still managed to fail; to confound; to fold; to be somehow less than zero; to somehow make things worse.  We can sarcastically thank Bush/Cheney for the many disasters and plagues they inflicted on our nation, but one of the most damaging and underrated is this idea that you NEVER, EVER apologize for anything, or admit OBVIOUSLY catastrophic mistakes and misjudgments you made during the course of your public life.  It was obvious by her initial silence that Would-be President Clampett was going to follow this ethos down to the letter and not admit that the target graphic was, at bare minimum, in poor taste.  No. That would be “weakness” in her underdeveloped wingnut mind.  So instead we get this cheap, tone deaf approximation of gravitas in a video with a mock-up mockery of Oval Office staging that simultaneously belittled and caricatured everything about the office of the Presidency to a level of morbid abjectness and absurdity beyond the reaches of our greatest satirical minds.  The banality of it all was unbearable enough, but then came the inexplicably out of context use of the historically loaded phrase “blood libel” (no doubt ghostwritten).  Whoever inserted that phrase into the speech must have mistakenly assumed that Would-be President Clampett in all her supposed Israel loving splendor would have some grasp on its historical meanings and connotations, but, sadly, what she seems to have grasped is only the literal Nouveau riche redneck translation of the phrase: ie, she ain’t liable for any blood spilled no matter how many mentally ill people she may have agitated and/or inspired last year with her cute political bullseyes and strident calls to RELOAD.  It’s almost like the Clampett braintrust deliberately tried to make the situation worse by injecting more anger and more vitriol, all while comfortably placing Would-be President Clampett in the only role she can play, but never, ever quite fits: victim.

This was a grotesque, distortion of the very concept and idea of national leadership.  I try to remain somewhat civil and serious on this blog, but this woman is absolutely nothing but a petty, bumbling, white trash opportunist, who’s every action simultaneously mocks and disproves the very concept of the “American Exceptionalism” she constantly espouses.